Liking

Liking is one of Robert Cialdini’s six factors of influence.

You will find that I use the phrase “know, like and trust” throughout Your Profit Club, almost as a euphemism for the marketing and sales process.

Robert Cialdini identified four factors for liking:

  • Physical attractiveness
  • Similarity
  • Compliments
  • Familiarity

It may seem unfair but people who are physically attractive have a big advantage. There have been plenty of psychology experiments to show that peopel are more eager to impress and get on with those who are considered attractive. It’s not just middle aged men drooling over the busty blonde secretary!

Sadly we haven’t all been blessed with the looks of Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie but we can each choose to make the most of what we have been given.

Clean, nice-smelling, tidy and smart wins over dirty, sweaty and dishevelled.

Similarity goes back to the idea that “people like people who are like themselves.”

Common interests and beliefs are a quick way to establish rapport. If you can find a few points of similarity with someone else, you expect to find more as the relationship deepens.

Compliments can be cheesy and insincere but when they are genuine, compliments are very powerful.

It’s very flattering for the ego and people like people who like them.

Let’s go back to school and your early experience of the opposite sex.

Do you remember how you looked at a girl (or boy) differently if you’d heard on the grapevine that they liked you. First they had your attention and second, you’d look for things to like back.

Few of us receive much praise as adults. It’s easy to get trapped into negative feedback and only hearing about problems and mistakes. When someone compliments you or remarks on something you’ve done well, it really is “music to your ears”.

Finally the last factor that affects liking is familiarity. The more time you spend together when things are going well, the more you associate the good feelings with the person.

In business you want to be liked and you can also borrowing the liking from others.

Referrals and endorsements work so well because the original relationship is strong.

If I like Ian and Ian likes Lee, then I will probably like Lee.

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